alternative hippopotamus

progressive cyberdadaism from our nation’s capital

August 31, 2007

Surge Report: My Plan was Totally Awesome

by AltHippo @ 5:21 pm. Filed under Uncategorized, Iraq

If I were General Petraeus I wouldn’t work so hard. For example, I see this quote from the Washington Post:

[Petraeus] “is expected to report to Congress next month that there are some signs of progress in Iraq and that a precipitous U.S. withdrawal could be disastrous.”

Why bother with the heavy-duty Republican spin words like “precipitous”? Petraeus might as well submit a single page titled: “What I did on my summer offensive.” The body of the report could be something like: “I could quote some meaningless statistics. But does it really matter what I say?”

The answer to that obviously rhetorical question is an equally obvious “No.” It doesn’t matter. Every couple of months Bush is going to say, “Gimme $50 billion.” And, in the end he’ll get the money with no strings attached. Sometimes through a filibuster, sometimes through a veto. Sometimes out of resignation the Dems won’t even bother to try to kick the football that Lucy’s holding.

Just for fun I looked up synonyms to “precipitous”. Here’s what I found:

abrupt, breakneck, brief, frantic, harum-scarum, hasty, headlong, heedless, hurried, ill-advised, impatient, impetuous, impulsive, indiscreet, madcap, plunging, precipitant, precipitate, quick, rapid, rash, reckless, refractory, rushing, subitaneous, sudden, swift, unanticipated, uncontrolled, unexpected, unforeseen, violent, willful

Correct me if I’m wrong, but aren’t those words that describe the invasion, not the proposed withdrawal?

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One Response to “Surge Report: My Plan was Totally Awesome”

  1. Jamelle Bouie Says:
    September 2nd, 2007 at 12:58 pm

    I’m not entirely sure why we go through this useless kabuki when everyone knows what the outcome will be.

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