alternative hippopotamus

progressive cyberdadaism from our nation’s capital

February 23, 2006

I’ve Got Them On My List

by AltHippo @ 1:39 pm. Filed under Uncategorized

One of my favorite stage roles was playing Koko from Gilbert&Sullivan’s Mikado. I was in 9th grade.

Koko’s opening number, “I’ve Got Them On My List,” is a fast-paced ditty about people he’s slated for execution. One tradition in performances is to add a few lines from current events. In this case, the Watergate hearings were going on at the same time, so I suggested a few lines Like:

“And Haldeman and Ehrlichman and Gordon Liddy, too.
I’ve got them on my list.
They never would be missed.”

Unfortunately, the music teacher vetoed that. I’m not sure if it was her political leanings so much as she didn’t want to rock the boat. But the key result was that the leading figures of Watergate didn’t make it into our 9th production of Mikado.

If I ever do Koko again, there’s a couple of groups that I’d have to insist would be on the list:

  1. Christian Exodus. Apparently, there’s a group down in South Carolina that’s recruiting Christian Fundamentalists to tip South Carolina ever further to the right. From USA Today:

    With a decisive majority, Burnell says, his group would be able to pass laws that line up with their biblical principles and their interpretation of the U.S. Constitution — laws that include outlawing abortion and homosexual relations, allowing governmental displays of Christian symbols and ending state-funded education.

    If you read the article, you’ll notice that Burnell would consider seceding from the Union, but only as a last option.

    I say, go for it, Mr. Burnell.

  2. South Dakota. In case you haven’t heard, lawmakers in South Dakota passed a universal ban on abortion (except when the life of the mother is at risk) by a vote of 23-12. (Washington Post)

    If you read the article, you’ll note that no abortion provider lives in South Dakota. They fly one in once a week from Minnesota.

    Here’s a thought: how ’bout you South Dakota folks getting together with your brothers and sisters in Dominionism from South Carolina. You form a new state, South Dakolina. And let the party begin.

  3. Whoever invented “trickle-down economics”. Bush eliminates capital gains, inheritance taxes, taxes generally for the wealthiest Americans. Here’s the result (from Reuters):

    Average real family incomes before tax slipped 2.3 percent between 2001 and 2004 to $70,700, the Federal Reserve said on Thursday in a survey of family finances it releases every three years.

    Median household incomes, in contrast, rose 1.6 percent to $43,200, the central bank said. Households saw their median net worth climb 1.5 percent over the three-year period to $93,100 — a much smaller gain than the 10.3 percent increase logged in the 1998-2001 period.

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One Response to “I’ve Got Them On My List”

  1. KCinDC Says:
    February 23rd, 2006 at 5:31 pm

    I wonder how much of the audience would have gotten the joke if she’d allowed it in. I remember a complete lack of response to a Nixon-tape-related joke we put into a puppet show in social studies class around the same time. Of course, our audience was other students, whereas you probably would have had a fair number of parents. (There’s also the strong possibility that my group was completely incompetent at comedy.)

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