The Emperor’s New Talking Points
progressive cyberdadaism from our nation’s capital
And I quote:
“GOSS: Well, I define torture probably the way most people would — in the eye of the beholder. What we do does not come close because torture in terms of inflicting pain or something like that, physical pain or causing a disability, those kinds of things that probably would be a common definition for most Americans, sort of you know it when you see it, we don’t do that because it doesn’t get what you want. We do debriefings because debriefings are the nature of our business, is to get information. We want accurate information and we want to make sure that we have professional people doing that work, and we do all that, and we do it in a way that does not involve torture because torture is counterproductive.”
End quote. “Wow,” I thought. “I’ve never seen such a dense collection of faulty rhetoric in one place. Then I read this excerpt from today’s Bush speech:
“Some critics continue to assert that we have no plan in Iraq except to, quote, ‘Stay the course.’
“If by ‘Stay the course,’ they mean, ‘We will not allow the terrorists to break our will,’ they’re right.
“If by ‘Stay the course,’ they mean, ‘We will not permit Al Qaida to turn Iraq into what Afghanistan was under the Taliban, a safe haven for terrorism and a launching pad for attacks on America,’ they’re right, as well.
“If by ‘Stay the course,’ they mean that we’re not learning from our experiences or adjusting our tactics to meet the challenges on the ground, then they’re flat wrong.”
Bush is using different techniques from Goss, but still, the sheer density of faulty rhetoric is astounding.
This site lists the common methods of abusing logic. See how many you can find in a typical administration speech. (short answer: lots)
While this site is mostly read in North America, readers in Canada, the Netherlands, Japan, Sweden, Germany, China, Italy, France, and the UK, account for about a third of the traffic.
In the US, California has the lion’s share of viewership. After that, Virginia, New York, Texas, Arizona, and Illinois. The District of Columbia is way down in the noise. (Note to folks who live here: check me out every so often, m’kay?)
The most popular download by a wide margin is a flash animation I put together last fall, intended to emulate one of those magnetic poetry sets you see in the bookstores. You can get it here.
Meanwhile, I’ve been at work, and have put together the first ever HippoCast. Check it out, I think you might like it.
In other news, Porter Goss parses the word ‘torture’: (Washington Post, A18)
“This agency does
not torture,” he said in an interview this week
with USA Today. “We use lawful capabilities to
collect vital information, and we do it in a variety
of unique and innovative ways, all of which
are legal and none of which are torture.”
Remember, if you order the Parsomatic now, you’ll also get the first season of Martha Stewart’s Apprentice.
Longer Nicolle Wallace:
BLITZER: Was it a mistake for the White House to compare what John Murtha was saying to Michael Moore, the liberal filmmaker?
WALLACE: You know, I think that words have such power in this debate. But if you look at the policy that Michael Moore advocated for the duration of last year’s presidential campaign, it is the exact policy that the congressman proposed.
But you know, again, I think the president and vice president have set the tone for this debate. I think we’ve made perfectly clear over the last five days that our differences with Congressman Murtha are in our visions for the best way forward in Iraq.
We believe — as do 79 United States senators, as do more than 300 House members — that what he proposed, which is an immediate withdrawal or a withdrawal based on an arbitrary timetable, is the wrong way to guarantee victory in Iraq.
And I think that, as people head home over the holidays, as people think about our troops over there fighting, it is comforting — and everyone should be comforted by the fact that the Congress, both chambers, spoke clearly and embraced the current administration policy about the way forward in Iraq.
…
BLITZER: The resolution that was in the Congress used the words ‘immediate withdrawal.’ And there were three Democrats who voted for that. Congressman Murtha talks about a six-month phased withdrawal and then keeping troops in the region, which is significantly different.
WALLACE: We still oppose anything other than a conditions-based withdrawal from Iraq.
I had this odd moment when I was at the Sears at Montgomery Mall getting my car fixed (it’s technically called Westfield now, but the lingua franca still has it at Montgomery Mall) when the guy at the counter asked me how come I didn’t take my car to a shop in DC.
“Well,” I thought to myself, “it’s because my family has taken their cars to this very same Sears for roughly twice the amount of time you’ve been alive.” But aloud I said: “just wanted to shop.”
It was one of those moments when all memory of the past is open and available to be re-lived. When you say to yourself: “Of course, I’m here.” And then right afterwards: “How did I get here?”
In theory, you’re supposed to have moments of intense recollection when you’re at the Louvre, the Sphynx, or the Parthenon. In my case it was at the Sears auto shop, Montgomery Mall.
………………………………..
When I moved back to DC I had a personal aim to meet three people: Josh Marshall, Dan Froomkin, and Tom Toles. To badly paraphrase Bush, badly paraphrasing Al Gore, I didn’t know that I would complete the trifecta.
Last night, Tom Toles was at Politics&Prose talking about his anthology Now Who Do We Blame? I put together my recollections of Toles’ talk, which I have to put in the genius category, here. I hope you check it out.
“Was it appropriate then in your view for White House press secretary Scott McClellan to say Murtha endorsed, quote, policy positions of Michael Moore and the liberal wing of the Democratic party?”
Wallace poses momentarily, considering what would be the most illogical response to that question. She shoots:
“Well, we can’t shy away from having a very honest debate about the policies.”
Over at the DCDL blog Keith shakes his fists at our favorite fish wrap:
Why is the Post presenting the Republican spin as the headline and lead of the story, with the actual facts and the contradictory analysis presented only many paragraphs in? It’s bad enough when the cult of “balance” results in articles giving equal weight to an outrageous lie on one side and truth on the other, but in this case the lie has become the story and the truth is relegated to a footnote.
I think I know what happened. Consider the sentence: “Legal experts said Woodward provided two pieces of new information that cast at least a shadow of doubt on the public case against Libby, Vice President Cheney’s former chief of staff, who has been indicted on perjury and obstruction of justice charges.” What legal expert could they possibly be talking about? Hmmm…
Toensing characterized this as the type of piling on that’s so typical of Washington, something she deplores. When I asked why she thought special prosecutor Patrick Fitzgerald was investigating the case so aggressively, Toensing interrupted my questioning, incorrectly inferring I said that I believed Rove was the subject of the investigation. “Stop, stop, don’t do that to somebody’s reputation!” she said. “He’s not a target.”
I could keep going, but all the spinning is making me dizzy.
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hip·po·pot·a·mus n. A notion, perhaps distinct from conventional wisdom, that needs to be verified by reality-based scrutiny.
95. Cogito cogito ergo cogito sum (I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.)
— Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary
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